According to recent surveys, 66% of Americans have an unfavorable view of China while 61% of Chinese have an unfavorable view of the U.S.A. As someone who loves China and loves to build friendships between China and the U.S., this grieves me.

Many of my friends are global citizens and share my grief. As relations seem to deteriorate, I have asked myself, “what is my role during this crisis?” Here are seven principles I have chosen to adopt AND share with others. Please consider adopting them with me:

Goodwill Principles:

1. Focus on people, not governments

The U.S government and Chinese government make decisions I don’t like. No surprise! That never stopped me from liking Chinese people or the culture. Don’t take your anger at governments out on good people.

2. Do not propagate hearsay

Just because you see something on the internet does not mean it’s true. And, likely, it has been shown to you through the eyes of the media sharing it. Separate fact from fiction and real reporting from bias.

3. Factually, most Americans and Chinese treat each other respectfully, in spite of the few examples sensationalized in our media

I have lived and traveled in China for over twenty years. I can confidently say, 99% of Chinese have treated me respectfully and, often, even better than they treat other Chinese. I have brought hundreds of Chinese to the U.S. I believe they would say they were also overwhelmed by American kindness and hospitality.

4. Do not blame Chinese in your country for things they have no control

Please do not take your stress out on Chinese people living or visiting your country. They have nothing to do with your present circumstances.

5. Understand, Chinese are proud of their heritage, just like we are of ours

Our countries are patriotic. Most of us love our countries and are hurt when others speak negatively about them. Please be respectful of people’s feelings towards their birthplace.

6. If you are afraid or threatened by an Asian, friend one, and you will see they are in fact so much like you

My company places Chinese, emerging leaders in the homes of American families AND we take Americans on “voluntourism” trips to China. All this is meant to develop people and forge friendships. Building a friendship sure builds empathy, understanding and even mutual respect.

7. Practice empathy. As difficult as it may seem, try to see things from their perspective

Empathy is feeling what others feel. It is so important in relationships. When you see or hear something disturbing, from someone in another country, try to take a moment and consider their perspective, before judging too harshly.

Furthermore, when you see another country’s people going through pain, do not wish harm on them or somehow determine they deserve it. Would you want that pain inflicted on those closest to you? Of course not. So, why would you wish it on others or laugh at another’s sorrow?

One relationship/one encounter at a time, we can make a difference. Let us be change agents for good between our respective countries.

Keep ascending………